A complete write off.

So I am thinking of completely writing off the first quarter of this year, with a possibility of extending that to the first half. Good friends of mine have been dealing with own personal hell. I don't wish to delve into that because honestly I don't wish to understand their level of hurt.

That and I have my own problems. I am back in Florida, third time in about a month (this time I flew). Last time for a while. My mother passed away a couple days ago. You might ask if this was a surprise or expected. It was a little of both, she had been on this path for a long time. My mom had a drinking problem for a long time. A drinking problem that finally caught up to her.

She went into the hospital around thanksgiving; the doctors gave up around news years. Friday morning we say goodbye. Its all kind of hard to believe. In a way i don't want to believe. I keep wanting to think this was all a bad joke. It should be. I was out earlier setting up a plant shelter for one of my dad's king sago palms and I kept expecting Mom to come out there and make some sarcastic remark about how long I was taking. But she isn't. I won't get phone calls on the weekends trying to guilt me for not calling sooner.

Ah shit, this post is getting hard to write, i better wrap this up quickly.......

There will always be a lot of un-answered questions about what happened: why did she start drinking again? Why did she hide that she was getting sick? why?